"A cat walked into a bar, sat down, ordered a beer, and started to knit..."

A few weeks ago I received a polite email in my inbox from Meredith:

"Hallmark has recently developed a brand new line of 'New Humor' cards, and as one section of this new line, the writers and artists at Hallmark have developed a series of cards based on the funny, friendly, and loving relationships between cats and their human companions."

She asked if I wanted to receive some greeting cards, and perhaps share them on the blog. Meredith mentioned she has a formerly feral cat. Anyone feral-savvy enough to use the words "formerly feral" definitely isn't just sucking up to the cat blogger. OK, so Meredith is for real. Send those cards my way!

In a few days a generous bundle of cards arrived. I naively expected some brightly humorous messages I could send to say...my mom, or some of my donors and volunteers...

Well. Maybe not. Was that cat really drinking a beer?

These aren't really cat-people cards. These are "FRIENDS of cat-people" cards!

Cat purists may find it somehow dishonorable to perch cats heads atop the rough edges of human behavior. I showed the series to a few cat folk. A familiar expression appeared on their faces. It was that look of disgust exhibited when one discovers the cat has peed in one's favorite shoes.

Some cat people just don't get poop jokes. Cat people live in constant fear that their house smells like cat box, and they worry they are the only ones who can't tell. That is why we look so stuck up all the time. We aren't snobs. We are just constantly sniffing.

Now dog people get poop jokes. When dogs fart, people laugh. When cats fart, everyone blames the dog.

My friends outside the Great Cat Circle laughed out loud when they read the cards. So friends who know you are far too over the edge about felines anyway will probably find the series hilarious.

Especially those guy friends who believe you are actually quite unbalanced to rescue cats but don't dare pick on you about it. Until they have a beer or two or three under their belts, that is.

You know who you are, guys.




I enjoyed this next one. I may send it off to the many sewers and knitters in my family. Use two chopsticks to turn a ball of yarn into a sweater? Puuleeze. How do they DO that?



I refrained from blogging the scatological card. Yeah, yeah, no sense of cat box humor. I kept wanting to grab a scoop.

I decided to go track down Hallmark and Shoebox on line.

Oh look! Shoebox has a blog.

Thanks, Meredith! I'll have to choose my victims...er...friends, carefully, when I send them.