Loss of friends.

Last week I received an email that Gary Storms had died.

The NYS Wildlife Management Association was created in 1992, primary due to the dedication of Lynn Braband. I received a letter in the mail from Lynn about the first meeting to form NYSWMA (it didn't even have a name at that time). I was a kid wildlife control trapper with a B.A. in philosophy. The letter I got talked about "professional ethics of wildlife control" and that was right up my alley. I was painfully shy but decided I would "sit in the back of the room." Mark told me, as I walked out the door "Whatever you do, don't let them make you Secretary or Treasurer." Well, there was a snowstorm and only nine attendees. There was no "back of the room." I came home as both Secretary and Treasurer of a new state association, and that began my introduction to a great group of men. And yes, they were all men.

They were all profoundly polite to the animal welfarist trapper who was also a cat lady. Gary, especially, was a lesson in honorable conflict. He and I disagreed on a lot of things. Yet it was Gary who was in Albany, giving public testimony that every cat deserves space in a local animal shelter instead of being left to die on the streets. It was Gary who bravely told a room full of domestic animal control folks at a NYSACA meeting (domestic animal sheltering) that nuisance wildlife control operators (NWCOS) were being called for feral cats that humane societies refused to handle. "And what" he asked "is happening to those cats?" I swear, he nearly got us both lynched, for daring to speak the truth. Gary was not a cat advocate, but he was an advocate for common sense. He did not feel that NWCOs should be handling cats, but if shelters turned a person away, by God, he was going to help that person. I served as Secretary of NYSWMA for six years and Gary, who had been very active every one of those years, took over the position after I burned out. He did a far better job of it than I had.

Gary died on November 5th of an aneurysm. I can't believe this. I have blown off meetings for well over a year now because I've been "just too busy." I assumed they would all be there when I managed to fit it all together again.

Well, life doesn't wait, does it? Friendship shouldn't wait, either.

Then just now I received another email. Just a week later, Wayne Zimmer, the vice-president of NYSWMA, has passed away, possibly of a heart attack. Wayne was another man who was "always there" in wildlife control, with a solid sense of humor and a willingness to work. He was another voice of the traditional trapper, but at the same time preached responsibility and ethics. These are guys who really got fed up with "feel good wildlife control" that claimed every wildlife conflict could be solved with ammonia, radios, or mothballs. On the other hand, they didn't tolerate cruelty or poor business ethics. They treated me like gold, even when I'm sure I drove them mad with my welfarist ways.

It is so hard to Google your friends, when they have passed on, and discover that only their web pages remain for you to read.

There comes a time when work, while important, can't be your fulll-time job. There are people who deserve your attention, and there is weight you need to pull elsewhere.

I will be at the next NYSWMA meeting. I don't know if that makes a difference, but I'll be there anyway.

If there are people you care about...friends you haven't seen, or some group you love but you have been putting off because other things are pressing and you "know they'll understand..."

Stop. Go. Go now.